Life Management

Just finished Life Management for Busy Women; it took a ridiculous amount of time for me to read it, but the title says it all! My mission this past year has been about prioritizing and managing my time (which by the way the author says we can't really manage time, but we can manage ourselves and how we use our time). I have been talking about balance for years now-but achieving it? Not so easy. I am finding myself in this period of life where I am looking back, looking in, and looking up.

Looking back-that has been filled with sadness, regret, sweet memories, and joy. Our faith has teetered in that area of our lives-because, we believed if we did A, B, and C, then the result would be D, E, and F...but it wasn't, so then the questions, " who is to blame?" Our faith was shaken to the core, and had it not been for God, we would have absolutely hit bottom. No matter how hard I searched, I just couldn't get past the hurt I was feeling during the last few years of my life, until I realized that if I could see everything, where would the need for faith be? God wants my trust even when I can't see or make sense of my life.

Looking in- asking alot of questions, like, "what am I doing?" "What should I be doing?" "...the point?" Must be middle age crisis...whatever it is, I know that my heart's desire is to live my life according to God's plan. The issue is finding His plan in the midst of everything else clouding my view. I am trying to hear Him and follow Him, but getting the priorities of my life in order (that has been rather challenging too).

Looking up-trusting in God to reveal Himself as I seek Him, and not only me personally but knowing and trusting in the truth of God's Word as it applies to people I love. He does promise that His Word will not return void. I hope in Him, not in the circumstances that surround me, not in religion, not in what I can do, but in what He can do.

Parenting is certainly not for cowards (it connects really...it is the area we are looking back on which results in us looking in and looking up!) Not one single thing throughout our entire adult life has impacted us more than having children...nothing...and now we watch other parents interact with their children, and we can see so clearly. Somehow it is so much easier to see from this angle! We notice that parents way too often don't have balance-discipline when need be, but positive and encouraging as well-more positive and less negative. Parents tend to spend more time lifting up their kids' good points to everyone but their kids. The kids hear the "do this" and "don't do this," not the "I am proud of you" stuff. We are guilty too-did that. Spent more time bragging about our kids to everyone but them...just didn't tell them enough... we love you and are proud of the independent accomplished people you are.